Narcissism and Love in Great Gatsby (Essay Example)

Narcissism and love. Both are vastly different but achieve the same outcome. These two can end a relationship, which is exactly what happens in The Great Gatsby. Due to their personalities, Daisy and Tom have a difficult time getting along. Whereas Daisy and Gatsby face difficulties as a result of their love for others. In F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby, the narrator Nick Carraway reveals how narcissism and love can destroy the bonds between Tom and Daisy and Gatsby and Daisy.

It's debatable whether Daisy truly loves Tom in their relationship. Tom has a narcissistic personality and believes in himself too much. This is all due to “the fact that he had one [a mistress] was insisted upon wherever he was known. His acquaintances resented the fact that he turned up in popular restaurants with her, leaving her at a table, sauntered about, chatting with whomever he knew” (Fitzgerald 20). Tom is concerned about what people think of him. He craves to be liked by others and will go to any length to achieve this goal. Tom, too, is apathetic about what he does. He has an unclear reason for cheating on Daisy. Tom is only concerned with his own feelings, not Daisy's. He decides to cheat on his wife so more people will like him, causing his desire for attention to ruin his marriage to Daisy. Tom isn't the only one to blame for the downfall of their relationship. Daisy, like Tom, has flaws. “They were careless people, Tom and Daisy—they smashed up things and creatures and then retreated back into their money or their vast carelessness or whatever it was that kept them together, and let other people clean up the mess they had made” (179). Daisy and Tom are thought to be careless and uncaring about others. They let others clean up after themselves. Their relationship is almost platonic, despite how well it works. These narcissistic personas aren't doing their relationship any favors. They are unconcerned about others and are displeased with themselves. Their features and riches, rather than love, are what keep them together.

Daisy has been wanting to leave Tom for a long time since she was head over heels in love with Gatsby. Despite the fact that he was in love with her, Gatsby went out to war, and he remained madly in love with her throughout the war. When he returned, he still loved her and even “bought a house so Daisy would be just across the bay” (28). Gatsby is so fascinated with this one girl that he buys a house only to be near her in hopes of catching her eye. He spends all of his money in order to impress Daisy and prove that he is worthy of her affection. Gatsby is doing everything for Daisy out of love, but he isn't sure whether she would appreciate it because he doesn't know if she still loves him as they did before the war. Daisy and Gatsby have an affair while she is still married to Tom, so spending the money pays off in the end. Gatsby wants Daisy to leave Tom and admit she never loved him. Daisy has a huge problem with this because she “can’t say she never loved Tom” because “it wouldn’t be true” (133). Daisy is in love with two men, but one of them is her husband. This sentence breaks Gatsby's heart, and he realizes how her love for another man has ruined their relationship because he knows she will never leave Tom, and thus will never have the opportunity to be with Daisy. 

Despite their differences, Tom and Gatsby have a lot in common when it comes to their relationships. These two men will go to any length to have Daisy and use their wealth to keep her. After France, Tom took him and Daisy to a variety of places “unrestfully wherever people played polo and were rich together” (6). Tom only wants to live in a wealthy neighborhood. He uses his wealth to attract Daisy to accompany him everywhere, and she agrees because she wants his money. Daisy is only with him for the money, which Tom doesn't mind because it means she likes him, and Tom craves other people's attention. Unlike Tom, Gatsby earned his money on his own, but he still spent it on Daisy. Gatsby was known for throwing extravagant parties that cost a lot of money. He did this in hopes of “her to wander into one of his parties, some night” (79). It is now revealed why Gatsby is throwing parties: to get closer to Daisy. Gatsby spends his money on her because he wants her to notice him. Gatsby, like Tom, desires attention, but he only seeks it from Daisy because he loves her.

Relationships are difficult to navigate, especially when love and narcissism are involved. Despite their vast differences, they create similar results. This can be seen in F. Scott Fitzgerald's work. The relationships between Daisy and Tom and Daisy and Gatsby are explored in The Great Gatsby. Narcissism impacts Tom's relationship, and love towards others takes a toll on Gatsby's relationship. Daisy's relationships with each of the men crumble despite the fact that they are compatible. Regardless of the fact that they are different, they have the same effect.